sparklebutch: (brimstone:  devil made me do him)
[personal profile] sparklebutch
Cinder said, in chat, "Everytime you write gay-slash-porn Jerry Fallwell cries." This is for her.



Every time a slasher writes gay porn, Jerry Falwell cries.
In fact, nowadays he barely has time for anything else.
He sits by his computer, tears running down his face, and goes through a box of tissues every hour.
"...His ass was pounded hard.." Jerry's breath hitches, and his lower lip trembles.
He needs herbal tea to calm a bit. "And the big, hard cock..."
Incidentally, a million angels are getting their wings, so fast and so often that the heavens look more and more like a swarming beehive of white fluff.
And somewhere deep within the USA highest military offices, Ethan Rayne sits, types, and laughs his ass off. They don't ask, he doesn't tell, but he can see Mr Falwell crying, and he thinks, justice is done.




Disclaimer: I actually, believe it or not, meant no offence. If the man doesn't like gay porn, well, to each his own. If he hates me for liking gay porn, he has issues. If he wants to do bad things to me because of the gay porn, his God will take care of him, and not in a good way. Any way, no one really thinks this story is anything but pure fiction. Like Melle said, "Mr Falwell, if you sue me, the whole world will be picturing this. If you leave me be, only me and a handful of pervs will. Do the maths."

Date: 2006-02-04 12:25 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sparklebutch.livejournal.com
Not. My. Fault.

Things That Are Not My Fault for 100$, please.

Date: 2006-02-04 12:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tsavoritegarnet.livejournal.com
I like it. Ethan has a lot going on! Good for him!
From: [identity profile] sparklebutch.livejournal.com
Mischief. It's what's for dinner. :)

Date: 2006-02-04 02:53 am (UTC)
ext_29947: fractally generated dragon head, gold on blue (Default)
From: [identity profile] fledge.livejournal.com
Heee! A swarming beehive of white fluff! Love the description.

Who is Jerry Fallwell though?

Date: 2006-02-04 02:57 am (UTC)
ext_24830: (slightly embarassed)
From: [identity profile] medelle.livejournal.com
Jerry Fallwell is a very well known American Tele-Evangelist - along the vein of Pat Robertson, but not quite as loopy.

Everything you wanted to know about Jerry Fallwell but were afraid to ask.

Date: 2006-02-04 04:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sparklebutch.livejournal.com
Thanks :) Who he is and why we pick on him - ask Cinder.

Date: 2006-02-04 04:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cinder1013.livejournal.com
I think he's just as loopy as Pat Robertson. He's the one who got on TV with his good friend Pat after the terrorist attack in NYC and said, "The abortionists have got to bear some burden for this because God will not be mocked. And when we destroy 40 million little innocent babies, we make God mad. I really believe that the pagans, and the abortionists, and the feminists, and the gays and the lesbians who are actively trying to make that an alternative lifestyle, the ACLU, People for the American Way, all of them who have tried to secularize America, I point the finger in their face and say: you helped this happen."

Go Ethan!!! Make him suffer!!!

Date: 2006-02-04 05:09 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sparklebutch.livejournal.com
Someone with, you know, friends, should start a challenge based on this entire thing called Make Jerry Cry. A slashsmut challenge. Just to get everyone to write, leave a comment with a link, have a collection of porn in his name.

Date: 2006-02-04 05:12 am (UTC)
ext_29947: fractally generated dragon head, gold on blue (snarly)
From: [identity profile] fledge.livejournal.com
DEAR. SANITY. And they LET people like this rant on mainstream TV??!!

Date: 2006-02-04 05:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sparklebutch.livejournal.com
They let them run large parts of that country. Very amusing. You know, until you realise it's reality. Then, less amusing.

Date: 2006-02-04 05:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] darthhellokitty.livejournal.com
I remember that quote, 'cause my husband said "Wow! That's all our friends!" ;-)

Date: 2006-02-04 02:56 am (UTC)
ext_24830: (Default)
From: [identity profile] medelle.livejournal.com
I love that!!!

Date: 2006-02-04 04:08 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sparklebutch.livejournal.com
I'm glad then :)

Date: 2006-02-05 05:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] leetal.livejournal.com
LOLLOLLOLLOLLOL! :D

Love yah *bg*

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